Crawling out of the chrysalis

I nolonger have anything familiar left in my tool box:

• The umbrella of wailing in self-pity when not able to cope: Gone
• The hammer of justifying being dependant on relationships for the sake of relationships: Tossed out
• The cat'o nine tails of pretending not to feel guilty about having the sex drive of a brick: Broken
• The microphone for telling myself stories regarding my health and state of mind: Quite quiet
• The tool of pleasure that is a part of the codependancy: Out of my reach

I now have a new, bright and shiny tool box. In the box I have a few tools that I'm still whittling to perfection and I few tools that I am using with ever-increasing success. Some actually cause pain to wield, others bring me closer to my objects of tranquility and personal acceptance.

• The balm of laughter. Powerful and slightly sobering. This is one of the tools that can hurt when I laugh and laugh and laugh.
• The headphones of listening to what I want.
• The tingle of presence
• The vehicle of love, carrying me wherever I need to be
• The wide open plateau of forgiveness.

The view from the false summit is just enough to encourage further climbing. The climb is hard, but pleasant. I feel as though I am dancing, creating the steps as I go along, finding the rythm of my being.

My head is out of the chrysalis, I await the sunrise and the spreading of the wings I have is moments away.

Watch me fly!